The Big Wedding from a Dog's Perspective

By now you have read about my adventures in Coer d'Alene, Idaho and the tedious road trip. While it was interesting to see the lake, I wasn't interested in wading or swimming. It was hot, over 100 degrees, and I just don't understand what all the fuss was about.

So here's how THE WEDDING was for me, a mere dog:

When we arrived, I asked to go at least see where the wedding was to take place, so we did. We drove into a beautiful resort and down a winding road past golf courses and parked in front of a HUGE event center right on the lake. I saw some people and asked to go have a peek. So we did. IT WAS THE WEDDING REHEARSAL.

They weren't doing much of anything. Just standing there.

I wasn't allowed at that either, despite there being some lush green lawn to roll on. But I got to see the people, including some of MY family. I saw them standing overlooking the lake. They weren't eating, playing games or doing much of anything. All of a sudden I wasn't all that interested in going to the wedding. It looked BORING!

So the next day, I spent most of my time checking out dog parks and taking walks along the beautiful lake. I also, mentally, got ready for the fun I was going to have that evening when my owner was at the BORING wedding.

I had decided to watch movies and order pizza from Domino's (they deliver). I planned to have a triple meat pizza... yum!

So after she got all dressed up and took me for my last walk of the evening, she told me I was staying in the room and had better NOT BARK EVEN ONCE! Well, I was going to be so busy that I really didn't think I needed to bark.

This is the way my owner left me. Don't I look innocent?

As soon as she closed the door, I jumped up on the triple sheeted cushy human bed and reached for the phone. I ordered the pizza. Then I turned on the TV. She had left it on the QVC shopping channel. I tried to switch it to the Pay Per View section so I could order movies but it just wouldn't work... DRAT!

The pizza came and I paid with my owner's credit card. (I have memorized the number). It was delicious!

So I was watching QVC when I figured out I COULD ORDER THINGS BY PHONE! I dialed their 800 number and ordered:

A Sleep Number Adjustable Bed (my dog bed is getting old, anyway)

Some Steaks from Kansas City Steak Company

Wen Pet Shampoo for Dogs

That kept me pretty busy. I'll bet my owner will be surprised when everything is delivered!

By then I was tired. I fluffed up the pillows on my owner's bed, made a coonie nest and went to sleep.

Then I heard the key in the door. She was back! I'm glad I hid the pizza box! I jumped off the bed and stretched, innocently, so she would think I had been sleeping on my travel bed on the floor all evening. She was happy to see me (and thankful I had been so well-behaved)  and brought me some prime rib pieces from the Wedding. PRIME RIB! NOBODY TOLD ME THERE WOULD BE FOOD AT THE WEDDING. Drat!

But I had a pretty good time. Even if I didn't get to go, I wish Cristina and Jace Best Wishes for a long and happy married life.

Love, Cinnamon